A Story
From an Athiest to Spiritual Awakening
Kia Ora, I am Fery and thanks for your time reading my journey.
I was born in China and moved to New Zealand 2018 on a working holiday.
Since then, my whole life has changed dramatically,
the spiritual awakening turned me from an Atheist to the spiritual person I am now.
There is no way back,
The healing always continues,
but I know it's worth the journey.
There is a Chinese saying I quite like about is
"願你歷經山河，覺得人間值得."
It means, May you experience mountains and rivers,
still feel it is worthy of this journey on earth.
My Spiritual Beliefs
We all are spiritual beings with human experiences.
We incarnate on earth to learn certain lessons to evolve as a soul.
The cycle of life on earth is an ascension path for our soul's evolution.
We are all here to learn how to love and be loved.
We go through all the human emotions to master unconditional love,
so that our Mother Earth, Solar System and Humanity can ascend to higher dimensions,
Where there is no fear, only love exists.
We are all part of it and we are all connected.
True spirituality is never about the division between spiritual and non-spiritual,
we all have innate spiritual gifts that need to be awakened so that we can learn how to be better human beings on this planet.
Spirituality is not always about love and light,
it requires practice and discernment to distinguish the dark and the light.
it requires courage to face the shadow and trauma within us or were carried with us.
it requires determination to heal and follow the path less travelled.
it requires healing not just your mind, but also your body and spirit to be in alignment.
it requires time, patience and openness to receive.
It's a bloody long and challenging journey,
but it's worth it once you arrive on the other side.
The greatest success for me is not to be spiritually enlightened,
but to be an authentic human being who can make a real difference to help humanity.
Journey of Tarot - Guidance in Depression
In 2018, I was clinically diagnosed with depression. I lost my job, broke up with my partner at the time, and suffered from insomnia for a couple of years due to a materialistic fast-paced lifestyle. My only belief back then was making money to get a better life.
Until everything crumbled in my life, I realised that was not what I wanted, it was the society, the expectations from my parents, and everything they wanted me to be. So I left everything behind, to go to the other side of the planet - Aotearoa, on my 28th birthday to find out who I really am.
During that period, initially, I was using tarot content to help me study English, and also seeking divine guidance to help me go through the darkness. Occasionally, I get inspired to upload the reading I do for myself to YouTube. It gained 1000 followers within a week and increased in numbers I couldn't believe, it was like some miracle that pushed me on the path of becoming a tarot reader and since then I started to do readings professionally to help people navigating life in their crisis.
When I look back, that was the universe that gave me the nudge of where my life direction should be but I wasn't fully spiritual enough to comprehend back then. It was funny how life works in this way, and how magic the universe weaving our life.
Reiki & Mirimiri
The Spiritual Awakening
In 2020, I had a painful breakup with my twin soul that led me to attempt suicide on my Saturn return. That was the first time I felt completely lost physically, emotionally and spiritually. It was very different from the depression I had experienced, it's way deeper and i learned later on that called the dark night of the soul which is spiritual depression. I've tried all the things I could do to help me feel better, but none of these normal ways you could think for depression worked. So I had to open my mind to try alternative healing as I knew I had nothing to lose at that point in life.
I was sceptical about all these "woo-woo" things until I did a Mirimiri workshop with Jolie Davis (Maori healer from Manawa Ora). That experience showed me tangible evidence of some higher force's existence and that's a true turning point in my life.
When the healer removed an entity/curse inside of my body, I physically felt the energy moving out as well as the emotional pain while it moved, I uncontrollably cried and screamed shit out of me until I finally let that energy out. The moment that energy was removed, I knew the demon I was talking to every day, denied by all the counsellors and therapists, was gone.
That moment was profound, everyone in the group who had witnessed it cried for me and celebrated my liberation from a heavy burden. I still remember when I asked the healer what was that thing in my body, she said it was gone and that was what matters, don't be caught up by the story. This is still my healing principle now, we don't need to get caught up in all the spiritual stories, as the most important thing in healing is to clear the old energy that no longer serves us and fill that energy space with love, peace and trust.
However, Mirimiri was too physically demanding for me as a practitioner. So I developed a huge interest in energy healing and feel the urge to share with others. Before Mirimir, I was already attuned to Reiki 1 & 2. Even though Reiki helped me go through the crisis in a profound way I wasn't fully convinced by it until I had that tangible experience in Mirimiri.
After that experience, I started practising reiki on others actively while volunteering at Mana Retreat for an extended 6 months due to Covid. The most intense session I had was with one of my friends, during the session his whole body was shaking and it even scared me a little bit, as I had no idea what was happening, but that's also tangible evidence for me that reiki works. Since then I have started to practice Reiki on others, and it's been 4 years now.
I still loved every session of it. Because it allows me to trust the healing will happen as it should be not how I want it to be. It has transformed my life as well as so many people I have encountered in my reiki sessions. I felt truly fulfilled and happy when I saw people's energy change after the session and the healing truly landed in their hearts.
Ancient Astrology
Deepening the path
I have been interested in the stars since I was little. I like to talk to stars and it seems that is where my true home. Becoming an astrologer is not a proper career you should dream of back home so I killed it in the womb due to the materialistic belief system I absorbed in China.
However, when life takes dramatic turns those old dreams will still rekindle. Born in a non-religious, non-spiritual family, when life hit I had nothing to believe. So i remembered how the stars can give me comfort. Luckily in New Zealand, I find great freedom to explore my spirituality and becoming an astrologer is one of them.
I self-studied and took some courses with local astrologers to learn tropical western natal astrology. it helped me to understand myself psychologically and how to use astrological transit timing to navigate life. However, I started to pull off from it for a while due to my spiritual growth, as I felt there was more that astrology could offer, and it shouldn't just be the psychological understanding of it, I needed more than that.
Then I discovered Esoteric Astrology (Soul-centred astrology) under Alice Balley's teaching. It was eye-opening and spoke to my soul. However, the only person who continued her astrology teaching died just before I discovered this type of astrology, but I knew this was something I wanted to go deeper and this is the type of astrology that could help so many lightworkers here understand their soul's mission and their evolutionary path.
I guess once you start to learn astrology, you become a lifelong student of it. I randomly discovered horary astrology, a branch of astrology that could help you answer specific questions in life. I loved its practicality and was amazed by its accuracy of how things unfold. So I studied a Horary Practitioner course from STA (School of Traditional Astrology) and now I am offering horary consultation.
For me, Astrology is not a predictive tool to foresee the future. It's a life compass to help us understand how to work with cosmic energy instead of against the current. Our blueprint has already been written in the star, only when we bring awareness to it that's when we have a better chance to reach our highest potential. It's a tool that helps us understand ourselves better in all areas of life and have a glimpse of our soul's purpose in this incarnation. Nothing is fated, but how the planet's movement affects our life depends on your consciousness. it's like we come with default play cards of life, good or bad, the more you learn about what you have and learn how to make the most of what you have the higher the chance you will master your life instead of letting life control you. Astrology helps you bring awareness to who you are and who you are becoming. Learning how to play the cards well is one of the fascinating functions that astrology can offer.
Vipassana
Find the silence within
I came across the idea of doing vipassana (10-day silent meditation retreat) while I was on my healing journey at Coromandel. I was someone who couldn't sit down to meditate for 5 minutes. My mind was just so busy and I couldn't sit still.
However, life will always take turns when you are most unexpected. During my healing, I realized that all the suffering originated from our mind. And I am desperate to find a way to calm my mind and nervous system. So I booked my first vipassana in August 2022.
The first vipassana experience is definitely a very challenging one. I had digestive issues since day one I arrived. I had a panic attack one night and thought I could not make it. I was frustrated and agitated by myself all the time, it's a journey of being the master of your mind instead of letting it control you. This experience might be the most challenging thing I have ever experienced in my life and it was also the most rewarding one. From vipassana, I learned and physically experienced how our thoughts cause our suffering, how reactive our minds are, and also how powerful our subconscious mind can be.
The deepest silence within is where all our light is restored, to reach that, we need first to become the master of our mind. What I like about Vipassana is that it provides a very effective tool to help us purify our minds and practice emotional equilibrium which is essential for us navigating life.
More practically, I felt vipassana helped me find the inner self through silence, improved my whole nervous system and brought tremendous healing from the subconscious to the conscious. it's the most challenging experience I've ever had yet rewarding.
I still practice vipassana every day, and I know that's a lifelong practice too. Whenever life becomes overwhelming, i know I could go back to my breath knowing that all is well, and this shall pass too.
Shamanic Journey
A journey within
10 years ago, I would never imagined myself in Shamanic practice. And here I am deeply knowing that's a deep spiritual path I would love to go deeper in the future.
A lot of people ask me what shamanic healing is about, I would say is a way of being that connects us to the divine yet embraces all human experiences. It's a healing practice that not just brings love and light, but finds the core roots of an issue or a pattern, so we can address that core energy in order to change our internal world. It has to face your own shadow to learn how to be a healthy adult, to overcome all the conditions and programming to learn how to trust again, to learn how to love yourself deeply so we can also love others unconditionally.
I did a Shamanic training level 1&2 in March 2024, and finished Level 3&4 in November 2024, and now I am in the final process of becoming a qualified shamanic Practitioner with One tribe healing in Australia. The profound and intense experience I had during that training has tremendously changed my view about how proper healing should be done, how our energy works on so many different levels, and of course how to connect our spiritual helpers more efficiently.
During the training, I’ve experienced miracles in myself as well as witnessed in other participants. I was convinced this was a healing modality that could change people’s lives. We faced the deepest fear, the shadow self, the wounded child; We went through past life, ancestral healing and soul retrieval; We learned about nature spirit, and animal medicine and connected with our spiritual team, it was magical and transformational that was experienced physically, emotionally and spiritually. I came out of training with a deeper knowledge that I found my path.
The Journey contitues
There is no one's healing journey will be the same
There is no final destination for healing
But there is a way to love
After all the suffering, darkness and confusion in life
I am committed to this path
And I want to make a big difference in people's life
When life transforms, skin sheds, eyes open to the light.
We are back to one and we are love.
As Above, So Below;
As Within, So Without.